This Hotel Housekeeping Horror Dare Not Speak Its Name

I am referring of course, to that moment when…

oh, I shudder to think of it but for the greater good, in the hope of hotel ‘home improvement’…

yes that moment when you pull back those crisp Frette linens in your junior suite at the Ritz or Four Seasons or Andaz or Standard (ok, probably not the Standard) and you see..



…no, not Cher — she’s busy crafting her next mean-Tweet to Donald Trump!

…but yes you’re de-Frette-ing the bed, you want to rest after that long schlep back from CDG or OKC or JFK only to find that single long, black hair clinging like some kind of Clairol barnacle to your pillow. Probably a clean hair. BUT DO YOU REALLY WANT TO DEAL WITH A PHANTOM GUEST’S HAIR IN YOUR BED?? HELL NO!!!

So hotel management, heads up: it’s not enough to clean the sheets!! Doing the laundry is just the baseline. Housekeeping staff need to take the extra time, with each changing, to give those linens a once-over…and we’re not talking about anything unreasonable: just an extra 10 seconds or so per bed.

Those 10 seconds can spare paying guests the “eww” factor, encourage brand loyalty and ultimately get more heads on those supposedly heavenly beds.